August 2004 Archives

I've found myself a new kickboxing school and I've been enjoying myself tremendously. The instructor and members are extremely helpful and relaxed, operating like a family.
I missed out on the 1st grading but apparently there might be a private grading session in a few weeks... am definitely going to work towards that and a second one by November.
You need to be at least a level 2 to spar and that's exactly what I'm aiming for. I do miss the light contact spars from the previous school but the new one is definitely more organised and officiates everything, which is good as it provides a system of recognition for the hardwork and effort each individual puts into the training. It also provides a goal for everyone to work towards.

I am quietly excited! :)

Life without a modem the past week hasn't been as difficult as I initially thought it to be.
Suddenly I found the time to watch movies, the time to visit friends, to help a friend pack, to re-read old books and even catch 7, 8 hours of sleep.
I even found the time to cook and share it with friends in exchange for a night of movies, lots of laughter and a couch to call home for a night.
It might be another week before I get the modem back but I have to admit there were moments where I've thought it possible to live without connection from home.

I caved in and got myself one of these!
Ah, sweet 1Gb.

Forget the fact that it would probably get lost or corrupted before the entire 1Gb is used.
That's just irrelevant.

Tonight, I had one of those rare moments in kickboxing class - no fear of leaving with a bloody nose or a black eye.
If you've seen me in class, I'm usually the passive girl at the corner, defending herself all the time.
Found out that this Thursday will be the last class and I have to say I am very disappointed with the school giving it a flick.

I have requested to be graded for my next singlet. No doubt my grading will be hard.
Everyone will probably be out to kick and punch the living daylights out of one another.
Afterall, what are the chances we'll ever meet again?

Yet another hunt begins.. It'll be hard to find a school that balances fitness and technique.
The last thing I need is to be stressed about having to spar with some psycho every week.

Playing dice with warm sake = lots of fun and laughter

If only I remember what happened.

It's always so easy to have the need to revert to familiarity
To be assured in the outcome, to be assured of feelings
and with much confidence and certainty on how things would turn out, how certain things are said.
There will be no need to second guess my thoughts or your thoughts.
No need to risk hurting feelings as we know where we both stand on certain issues.
It is the silent understanding, no need for verbalising our thoughts or feelings.

There are days.. and nights where I sit back and ponder the outcome of my actions
Or like tonight, as I tried in vain to pre-occupy my mind, to fog out my frustration and almost anger
Tossing salads, chopping and slicing my daily ration of rabbit food

There is no description for where I feel I am.
It's almost a lack in rationality. Does it even exist anymore?
Lack of organisation; utter chaos and clutter.

The uncertainty and dis-satisfaction that life brings is sheer frustration.
The harder you push, the less fruit it will bear. There is much need to practice patience.
I ponder my actions and the result of numerous decisions made; the paths I have chosen.
Could things have turned out differently if I had been more patient?

There is no better form of comfort then seeking it in comfort itself.

If you've met me often enough over the past few months, you would've been no stranger to my complaints of tiredness, lack of sleep and general lethargy.
For someone who eats almost quite healthily (Although some might agree otherwise and believe I eat strange things) and who exercises about 3 times a week,
I was certainly lacking in the Oomph department despite the almost too frequent 10hour sleeps.

Endless trips to the doctor and tests detected nothing unusual.
I was tired of being tired. And so, out of desperation turned to my naturopath.
True enough, my body was depleted in all the B-vitamins, iron, potassium, magnesium.. and the list goes on.
It even got to the stage where popping a few pills didn't help anymore.

So, it's a personalised tonic concoction of gawd-knows-what to mend this body back together.

Winter need not be so dreadful afterall.

As August draws in,
The depth of winter awakens
Forging ahead, with every ounce of his cold wintry breathe.
This has got to be one of the coldest winters I can remember.

Fantastic snow falls, wet weather..
Chilly winds and perhaps made even colder with the departure of friends.

September will bring with her the beginnings of Spring.
With Spring, comes hope and new lease of life.
Where flowers begin to bloom and bright colours emerge from the past months of dull greys and blacks.

I am predicting endless days of sunshine and songs from birds
No doubt laced with my wheezing and coughing.
That is besides the point.
The point is to look beyond what lies directly in my path.

Evolution of mankind and the world
Technology, constant changes
Decades upon decades, no longer a measurement of obsoletion
Obsoletion is yesterday, obsoletion is just...

The world has shrunk
Man no longer grew roots
He goes where his heart leads
He follows no path

Countries, cities and towns
No longer home, just a place for the moment
The transient city, this is what Melbourne feels like

People come and go
The world's most liveable city
I'm just here for the ride

Standing under the warm shower head
Fleeting thoughts of a new future
New beginnings, different endings

Friends come and go
New faces, discoveries
Exchange of ideas and life stories
Treasures - each and every one.